FORESHADOW
  • Magazine
    • Contents
    • Podcast
  • About
    • Works

Autobiography (of sorts)

16/6/2025

0 Comments

 
Minnesota was a cold place to be born. My August arrival was a reprieve from winter’s fingers. I was aligned with flat land that kicked up trees too tall to climb. An Indian led me to the Lamb of God, I quaked, shook and shivered as I walked the aisle. He was Lakota, wore a blue suit and tie. I was tiny for a sinner, but I knew my need for redemption. He tied me to the Lamb and I thought—must I feed it or kill it? He gave no answer, just a smile.

The blonde girl sat in the one short tree that we had. I stood to the side and watched her, confused and mystified. Her body, the long thin legs beneath her jeans were cradled by the tree;

it was all too much. Then I explored death’s thick grip—all is loss. The dogs will only cause tears; bullets and school buses took them away, I will spare you the howls of imagined wolves, lupine trickery it was and I took it all in my fear-mounted hands and learned how small I was. In those years in California, shame became a well-tailored suit. A perfect fit and no frayed hems.

I wore it until it was too small. Dirt, the small house, Goodwill clothes, old car and shoes with holes all were soiled disappointments. I was soiled too and there were always more suits to wear. The test said, “a genius.” It was dangerous to have that high a number
--it felt like power. “A genius” it said.

The orange blossoms grew amidst that battlefield, where boys threw their juice-filled grenades, made killing noises and won no battles. The war was far away, we knew no better. Unfazed, we took our bikes home—it was dinnertime.

The story ends with broken pieces; I threw them in a yellow bucket along with the burned and rusted bike and the house’s ashes. I set them aflame.

--

Wayne Bornholdt is a retired bookseller with degrees in philosophy and theological studies. He lives in West Michigan with his wife and their three Golden Retrievers. He has published his work in a number of journals, among them: Ekstasis, Fare Forward (forthcoming), The Clayjar Review, Ravens Perch, and Amethyst.
0 Comments

Poems to God, No. 139

15/6/2025

0 Comments

 
Such grotesque
grinding graces,
surreal decades
lost in the cosmos,
suffered endurance
impatient pain
terminally unique
facing despairing,
the hidden God
treading me up
in fiery waters
as I flailed down
into the dark,
brutal graces                       
as I died
a million times
before breathing
became intimations
& labored epiphanies,
absurd cryptic graces
buoyant & persevering
every time I drowned
& washed-up gratefully
alive on another beach.
​

--
Alan Altany has BA & MA degrees in Catholic theology, and a Ph. D. in religious studies (University of Pittsburgh). He is a semi-retired, septuagenarian professor of Comparative Religions at a small college in Florida, USA.  He founded and edited a small magazine of poetry (The Beggar’s Bowl) and has published three books of poetry for in series, “Christian Poetry of the Sacred”:  A Beautiful Absurdity (2022), The Greatest Longing (2023), and Intimations (2024).  His poetry has been published by Tipton Poetry Journal, Beltway Poetry Quarterly, Valley Voices, Sand Hill Literary Magazine, The Hong Kong Review, North Dakota Quarterly, Montreal Review, St. Austin Review, and others. Website:  
https://www.alanaltany.com/. 
0 Comments

Poems to God, No. 123

15/6/2025

0 Comments

 
Your ancient Doctor of Grace
raised from his dead heresy
prayed “Lord, you have made
us for yourself…,” longing &
aching awfully for You,
holding breath underwater
in tidal floods of distractions
from Your overwhelming
brutal beauty buried within
like a red lotus blooming
& rooting in our restless
hearts palpitating in waves
of undying soulful thirst
for spontaneous union
with You, for breathing
down-deeply underwater
as sacred-hearted fish
riding the currents home,
a mysterious inertia
drawing us through our
eternal ecstatic addiction
to You, finally at rest
forever in Your absurdly
infinite & intimate love,
a mothering intensity.


--
Alan Altany has BA & MA degrees in Catholic theology, and a Ph. D. in religious studies (University of Pittsburgh). He is a semi-retired, septuagenarian professor of Comparative Religions at a small college in Florida, USA.  He founded and edited a small magazine of poetry (The Beggar’s Bowl) and has published three books of poetry for in series, “Christian Poetry of the Sacred”:  A Beautiful Absurdity (2022), The Greatest Longing (2023), and Intimations (2024).  His poetry has been published by Tipton Poetry Journal, Beltway Poetry Quarterly, Valley Voices, Sand Hill Literary Magazine, The Hong Kong Review, North Dakota Quarterly, Montreal Review, St. Austin Review, and others. Website:  
https://www.alanaltany.com/. 
0 Comments

Poems to God, No. 143

15/6/2025

0 Comments

 
the zen of old age
elegant minimalism
focal point of beauty
soul-time simplicity
clarity with purpose
permeating presence
beyond all distractions
avowing all pretense
& frivolous egomania
reduction of regrets
with deep gratitude
gone a flashing glitz
ordinary epiphanies
daily seeds of bliss
addictions deleted
pervasive prayer
& some new wisdom
among old scars
a spirited sensing
of sacred in common
hiding nothing more
from God’s waiting
for hearty striptease 
of all possessiveness
& boring posturing
mysticism of old age
as plain as readiness
to love & sing songs
momentary meditation
on truthful emptiness
no fearing of death
no deadening of life


--
Alan Altany has BA & MA degrees in Catholic theology, and a Ph. D. in religious studies (University of Pittsburgh). He is a semi-retired, septuagenarian professor of Comparative Religions at a small college in Florida, USA.  He founded and edited a small magazine of poetry (The Beggar’s Bowl) and has published three books of poetry for in series, “Christian Poetry of the Sacred”:  A Beautiful Absurdity (2022), The Greatest Longing (2023), and Intimations (2024).  His poetry has been published by Tipton Poetry Journal, Beltway Poetry Quarterly, Valley Voices, Sand Hill Literary Magazine, The Hong Kong Review, North Dakota Quarterly, Montreal Review, St. Austin Review, and others. Website:  
https://www.alanaltany.com/. 
0 Comments

Diary of Old Age, No. 8

15/6/2025

0 Comments

 
Such bizarre beauty
an impossible freedom
rising from old ruins
reaching elastic skies
eclipsing darkest night,
a prolonged pilgrimage
towards silence of love
& the beckoning God
one drama at a time
letting go of gravity
to glide with pelicans
above oceanic memories
from old suffered days
when nothing mattered
of brute slavish despair,
dawns by the thousands
diving down into shadows
finding common miracles
going step by stepping
through debris & delights
now marking 50 years
of a sober & clean soul
one moment at a time,
a ridiculous story in telling
too mysterious to fathom
too good not to be true
always beginning wisdom
raised beyond imagination.


--
Alan Altany has BA & MA degrees in Catholic theology, and a Ph. D. in religious studies (University of Pittsburgh). He is a semi-retired, septuagenarian professor of Comparative Religions at a small college in Florida, USA.  He founded and edited a small magazine of poetry (The Beggar’s Bowl) and has published three books of poetry for in series, “Christian Poetry of the Sacred”:  A Beautiful Absurdity (2022), The Greatest Longing (2023), and Intimations (2024).  His poetry has been published by Tipton Poetry Journal, Beltway Poetry Quarterly, Valley Voices, Sand Hill Literary Magazine, The Hong Kong Review, North Dakota Quarterly, Montreal Review, St. Austin Review, and others. Website:  https://www.alanaltany.com/. 
0 Comments

Diary of Old Age, No. 9

15/6/2025

0 Comments

 
50 years ago on April 5th,
half century as vultures fly,
I began a long, dramatic
and trembling entrance
as scared & doubting outlier
to the formidable horizon
of brutal, desperate sobriety,
the evasive & elusive sacred
sobriety rumored to exist
now possibly here at hand
through rigors of a passing
from captivity to first light.
50 years of swerving &
battered, but breathing,
sobriety against any odds,
50 strange, gracious years
of facing fiery dragons &
living between fear & love,
50 revolving years facing
absurdity & beauty circling
God & His ecstatic sobriety.


--
Alan Altany has BA & MA degrees in Catholic theology, and a Ph. D. in religious studies (University of Pittsburgh). He is a semi-retired, septuagenarian professor of Comparative Religions at a small college in Florida, USA.  He founded and edited a small magazine of poetry (The Beggar’s Bowl) and has published three books of poetry for in series, “Christian Poetry of the Sacred”:  A Beautiful Absurdity (2022), The Greatest Longing (2023), and Intimations (2024).  His poetry has been published by Tipton Poetry Journal, Beltway Poetry Quarterly, Valley Voices, Sand Hill Literary Magazine, The Hong Kong Review, North Dakota Quarterly, Montreal Review, St. Austin Review, and others. Website:  
https://www.alanaltany.com/. 
0 Comments

American dipper

14/6/2025

0 Comments

 
Do you see a curious stone-gray bird
There in volcanic rivulets splashing
With few a chattering or piping word
When down he dives in clear torrent flashing?
The sun’s joyful rippled reflections smile
While the dipper bathes and picnics awhile.

Bobbing and plunging in a country dance,
Balancing, tilting on long legs yellow-gray,
Set to moving water his varied stance,
We long for wishful moments he might stay.
But off he flies to some other pebbled stream
And leaves you a fleeting afternoon’s dream.

--
​
​Gareth Oakes, a native of Minnesota, lives in Oregon. He is an MFA student.
0 Comments

Vesper Sparrow

14/6/2025

0 Comments

 
He sings atop a tree at close of day
Beguiling the sun to tarry, not to stay,
Pleading him not to withdraw his light
Until dusk has failed and gloom gloats with night.
But with the bright season's returning strength
Each morning nigh midsummer extends its length.
Up he flits to a red cedar's steeple,
A tenor's voice calling all good people
To lift Te Deum in a warbled hymn
For the Ancient of Days, the Maker, Him
Who taught him the notes of the evensong
And the matins chant, melodious and long.
Cock your ear and at an angle prick it
Before he retreats to a cloister thicket
When mute winter dampens summer's chapel
And ends trilled prayers after fall’s ripe apple.

For a copper coin are two sparrows bought,
But none shall fall apart from Him who wrought.
While you may, heed the Sparrow's canticle;
Hear it resound in every particle:
To our Heavenly Father upward raise
All due proper honor, glory, and praise.
Come, all weary and broken-hearted,
Kneel and confess before night has started.
When on the field grass and buds is the dew,
Carol thanksgivings, the Creator’s due.

--
​Gareth Oakes, a native of Minnesota, lives in Oregon. He is an MFA student.
0 Comments

The Easter Lily

14/6/2025

0 Comments

 
Choked on a crumbling dirt bank eroded
Where the soil spoiled roots with the corroded
Acrid tang of weeping and haunting fears:
Fields sown with the salt of sorrowful tears
Made bitter through obdurate, haughty pride,
Withered by a dry desert wind that sighed
Over her wilting leaves and wrinkled bud.
Growing out of leanness, longing for mud
Soaked and caked about her stem to flourish
With nearby water flowing to nourish,
Moisten, and plump her tender wounded parts
Torn and broken by those deceitful arts
Which beguiled her to stray on wayward paths
And caused her to be worthy of greater wraths.
When the dews the hopeful renewal of spring
Globed in droplets which about her would cling,
Then her leaves greened full; her flower bloomed white
With deep crimson blotches that stained to blight
The pure face of ivory beauty fair
When all should be cast off, ev’ry thought or care.
The sky darkened with thunderheads frightful
Promising condensed knowledge insightful,
And when they broke, atonement downward showered
Causing abundant grace to be what flowered
Cleansing the bloody stains that dyed her petals,
Trickling down stem to damp dust that settles.
A trowel pierced the earth, pain cut her roots.
Lifting her from that soil of ashy soots
She clung to with musty deep-branching toes,
A Grower gathered and sheltered her from woes,
Potting and pruning, her growth to restore,
Of merciful drizzles she’ll never lack more.
For aside was she set for rows of plenty good
Where other blossoms bloom near there she stood;
The Planter’s appointed planting from all time
An anointed tilling by choice sublime
All plotted and ordered by His purpose set
And confirmed at Passover with payment met;
Of richer compost, the Lamb’s Blood, none has known
For all that it nourishes none will disown.

​​--​
Gareth Oakes, a native of Minnesota, lives in Oregon. He is an MFA student.
0 Comments

Doubt

13/6/2025

0 Comments

 
A hefty wren settles
on the tenderest branch
of a sapling ginkgo.
The bough bends, bounces,
yet holds--
a bruised reed He will not break…

Rosin-dusted strands press
taut violin strings.
The bow bends, wire writhes,
Bach reborn--
a bruised reed He will not break…

The sure God-beliefs
of my childhood
crack, crumble,
lie smoldering in
a doubt crucible,
Till borne on a
strange breath-wind,
the ashes rise, swirl,
a divine murmuration reformed--
a bruised reed He will not break…

--
​
Dr. Kellie Brown is a violinist, conductor, music educator, poet, and award-winning writer whose book, The Sound of Hope: Music as Solace, Resistance and Salvation during the Holocaust and World War II (McFarland Publishing, 2020), received one of the Choice Outstanding Academic Titles award. Her words have appeared in Earth & Altar, Ekstasis, Psaltery & Lyre, Foreshadow, Clayjar Review, and others. In addition to over 30 years of music ministry, she serves as a certified lay minister in the United Methodist Church.
0 Comments
<<Previous
Forward>>

    Categories

    All
    Anaphora
    Art
    Editorial
    Fiction
    Forethought
    Interview
    Music
    Non-fiction
    Photography
    Poetry
    Review

    RSS Feed

    Archives

    November 2025
    October 2025
    September 2025
    July 2025
    June 2025
    February 2025
    November 2024
    October 2024
    September 2024
    August 2024
    July 2024
    June 2024
    May 2024
    April 2024
    March 2024
    February 2024
    January 2024
    December 2023
    November 2023
    October 2023
    September 2023
    August 2023
    July 2023
    June 2023
    May 2023
    April 2023
    March 2023
    February 2023
    January 2023
    December 2022
    November 2022
    October 2022
    September 2022
    August 2022
    July 2022
    June 2022
    May 2022
    April 2022
    March 2022
    February 2022
    January 2022
    December 2021
    November 2021
    October 2021
    September 2021
    August 2021
    July 2021
    June 2021
    May 2021
    April 2021
    March 2021
    February 2021
    January 2021
    December 2020

Magazine
Contents
Podcast
About
Works
Connect with Foreshadow
Support our work
© COPYRIGHT 2020–2025. ALL RIGHTS RESERVED.
  • Magazine
    • Contents
    • Podcast
  • About
    • Works